I have been out of work 17 months. I have been looking for a job feverishly for the last four months applying to 10 jobs a week or so. Daycare will be very costly, jobs are paying less than a few years ago and they want you to work your butt off for no overtime. I have been layed off from major corporations twice in six years due to downsizing.
I like the benefits, social aspect and regular paychecks of a job at a large company. I don't like office politics, being denied vacation days and missing out on my kids lives. Every night I go to bed trying to decide-Do I really want another 9-5 job or do I want to try to do my own thing and start my own business.
For over a year now, my adoption lawyers have been telling me how great I would be at starting my own adoption advertising business. I would enjoy working from home, not paying daycare and making my own schedule. They would refer clients to me who need help with profiles, websites and advertising. I could place ads on their behalf. I did extensive research and demographics research on hundreds of newspapers last year, why let it go to waste right? Everybody in my family and all my friends say it's a no brainer and I should do this. Why am I so hesitant and afraid. I don't have much to lose. I have all the skills and knowledge to put this into action. I keep making excuses instead of making the decision to do this.
My heart is so into adoption. I often advise people at no charge. I find it hard to charge for my time and services, but I will have to get over that. I would be so happy to help people and know I have changed their lives. On the flip side, if the results aren't positive, I will feel bad for my clients. I guess I have to learn to separate my heart from my head a bit.
I can't keep mulling this over. I need to make a decision. I am wasting hours every week looking for and applying to jobs in a terrible job market. Domestic adoption is on the rise and there are lots of families out there who I could be helping. This is a great time to start up such a business and my attorneys believe in me so much, they are willing to sit down with me and take time out of their busy schedule to get me started. I guess it's time to start believing in myself and follow my heart into what I hope becomes a fulfilling career.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
American Girl has ticked me off!
The other day my 11 year old niece was over and we were looking at the American Girl website. I want to buy my youngest daughter a bitty baby soon and we joked last year how Jenna looked exactly like the blond haired bitty baby they sold LAST YEAR. I emphasize last year, because it seems in the last few months, they changed the blond bitty baby and the eyes are no longer blue. They are blue-grey now, but honestly, they look light green. I called American Girl and asked if they have any of the retired blond bitty babies in stock for sale. Of course they don't.
Now if I want to buy the bitty baby that looks like my daughter, I will have to search ebay and probably pay $100 with shipping for a $42 doll. I am so ticked. Maybe people will complain and they will bring back the blue eyed baby.
Here is the bitty baby I want that they sold for years with blue eyes!
Here is the new, current blond bitty baby with what I think are green eyes:
Now if I want to buy the bitty baby that looks like my daughter, I will have to search ebay and probably pay $100 with shipping for a $42 doll. I am so ticked. Maybe people will complain and they will bring back the blue eyed baby.
Here is the bitty baby I want that they sold for years with blue eyes!
Here is the new, current blond bitty baby with what I think are green eyes:
Saturday, September 20, 2008
A day or milestones...
Well today my girls both celebrated milestones. My older daughter had her first dance class for the year, and is now starting her third year of dance. She loved her class and is now taking ballet, tap and jazz. She still has the same dance teacher and was happy that most of the girls were from her class last year. I had to take the annual picture of her in her dance outfit as I do every year on the first day of dance class!
My younger daughter celebrated a milestone too-she turned 16 months old today! She may not look it, but my fireball is getting older and more mature every month! Of course, I had to take her monthly picture of her too. Now she rarely sits still and it hard to catch her posing! My favorite ended up being one in the high chair!
That's my girls-making me proud every day!!!
My younger daughter celebrated a milestone too-she turned 16 months old today! She may not look it, but my fireball is getting older and more mature every month! Of course, I had to take her monthly picture of her too. Now she rarely sits still and it hard to catch her posing! My favorite ended up being one in the high chair!
That's my girls-making me proud every day!!!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Our cruise on the Love Boat...
On Saturday, September 13th, was our 16th wedding anniversary. Months ago, we decided to book a one night cruise to nowhere on the Norwegian Cruise Line Spirit, out of NYC. My parents watched our girls for a weekend and we were off to celebrate 16 years of wedded bliss!
I had never been on a cruise before and was in awe of the port itself (there were two other cruise ships "parked next to us". Our ship had 13 floors, 11 restaurants and lots of stuff to do. Our room was small as we got the basic room with no porthole. I guess you could say we were in steerage! It was fine for one night. Better than I thought actually. I am claustrophobic and wanted to see how I could hand the small room-I was fine. We were barely in the room!
The food was great, the entertainment was great and it was nice to spend 24 hours not making bottles, cutting up food, changing diapers and telling kids what to do. We had a really great time on our cruise! We were very mature and made fun of the safety video playing in our room and had to try on the lifejackets just for fun! I really enjoyed my husband's company and we were so relaxed not thinking of the kids for one day.
This was a test and since we both liked the cruise, we will consider a longer one to a further away destination! Maybe a four day cruise next??? This is where it comes in handy to have a sister that is a travel agent! Here's a few pictures we took!!!
The shops and promenade on the Spirit
View of the west side of NYC at pier 88 (near Intrepid Museum)
Not bad for a picture taken by the camera on a timer! Love the fake window!
I had never been on a cruise before and was in awe of the port itself (there were two other cruise ships "parked next to us". Our ship had 13 floors, 11 restaurants and lots of stuff to do. Our room was small as we got the basic room with no porthole. I guess you could say we were in steerage! It was fine for one night. Better than I thought actually. I am claustrophobic and wanted to see how I could hand the small room-I was fine. We were barely in the room!
The food was great, the entertainment was great and it was nice to spend 24 hours not making bottles, cutting up food, changing diapers and telling kids what to do. We had a really great time on our cruise! We were very mature and made fun of the safety video playing in our room and had to try on the lifejackets just for fun! I really enjoyed my husband's company and we were so relaxed not thinking of the kids for one day.
This was a test and since we both liked the cruise, we will consider a longer one to a further away destination! Maybe a four day cruise next??? This is where it comes in handy to have a sister that is a travel agent! Here's a few pictures we took!!!
The shops and promenade on the Spirit
View of the west side of NYC at pier 88 (near Intrepid Museum)
Not bad for a picture taken by the camera on a timer! Love the fake window!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
It's September 11th-again...
Just about every year since September 11, 2001, I have watched some, if not all, of the reading of the names of those that died at the World Trade Center attacks. It's been seven years, but those families will always come out to the memorial ceremony. This year, some rather young children read names and then did it in memory of their father who died on 9/11. From how old they look, they probably barely remember him. Every year, what those family members say, often brings me to tears. Lives lost to soon. Children missing fathers, wives missing husbands, sisters missing brothers, and friends missing friends.
I am lucky, we did not lose anyone close to us on 9/11. I feel grateful for that. I also feel sadness every year for the thousands of people I never met, but yet feel their loss. Hearing their name, seeing a small picture, their age, and where they were from, makes it real. They were people with lives. If it weren't were fate, I could have been a grieving widow. My entire life would have been radically and tragically altered. God spared our family this pain. Other families were not so fortunate.
This year, I had to explain 9/11 to my oldest daughter, who was asked to where red, white and blue to school today. I gave a brief explanation of what happened. I didn't think a five year old needed to be frightened with images, she just needed to know it's a day to remember and to celebrate being an American. I'm sure in years to come, I will have to explain in further detail what happened to both my daughters. I don't look forward to that, but it's a part of life and now a part of history. A sad part of history.
If I live to be 100, I will always remember what I was doing when I heard of the 9/11 attacks. I will never forget.
I am lucky, we did not lose anyone close to us on 9/11. I feel grateful for that. I also feel sadness every year for the thousands of people I never met, but yet feel their loss. Hearing their name, seeing a small picture, their age, and where they were from, makes it real. They were people with lives. If it weren't were fate, I could have been a grieving widow. My entire life would have been radically and tragically altered. God spared our family this pain. Other families were not so fortunate.
This year, I had to explain 9/11 to my oldest daughter, who was asked to where red, white and blue to school today. I gave a brief explanation of what happened. I didn't think a five year old needed to be frightened with images, she just needed to know it's a day to remember and to celebrate being an American. I'm sure in years to come, I will have to explain in further detail what happened to both my daughters. I don't look forward to that, but it's a part of life and now a part of history. A sad part of history.
If I live to be 100, I will always remember what I was doing when I heard of the 9/11 attacks. I will never forget.
Monday, September 08, 2008
Happy Anniversary Grandma and Grandpa
Today is my grandparents actual wedding anniversary-62 years! WOW!!!!! It seems like just yesterday, they held a big 40th anniversary party-like a wedding! That was 22 years ago. My grandparents were afraid they would not make a 50th anniversary and had a big 40th so they could enjoy their party while they were healthy enough to dance.
Luckily, in spite of some healthy crisis's my grandparents are still in relatively good health and go out and do things almost every day. My grandfather is now 91 and my grandmother 81. We got the whole clan together to celebrate yesterday-the children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. We were 23 people in total I think. We had a wonderful dinner and it was nice to see my cousins and their kids. We ranged in age from the youngest (my daughter, who is one), to the oldest (Grandpa at 91). The youngest generation is made up of eight girls, all under the age of 11! My grandfather is still waiting for a great grandson!!!
I am lucky enough to come from a stable family where couples stay married for the duration. Last week, my parents celebrated 40 years of marriage and next week my husband and I will celebrate 16 years of marriage. My aunts and uncles are all married 35 plus years. Marriage isn't always easy-almost every couple married for many years has been through ups and downs. They only tell their closest family and friends-infertility, financial woes, health problems, loss of a child, strains of working, difficulties raising children, learning to compromise, and still loving each other through the journey.
It seems like the good times, the fun times and the love make all the bad times seem like distant memories. I can still remember our first few years married, some of the great trips we took, some of the silly things we did and the fun we had being young and in love. Although it's easy to take anniversaries for granted, we shouldn't.
We should celebrate each and every one. In this day and age, a lasting marriage is something to be celebrated. So here's to you-my grandparents-for setting such a fine example of what marriage and love are!
Luckily, in spite of some healthy crisis's my grandparents are still in relatively good health and go out and do things almost every day. My grandfather is now 91 and my grandmother 81. We got the whole clan together to celebrate yesterday-the children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. We were 23 people in total I think. We had a wonderful dinner and it was nice to see my cousins and their kids. We ranged in age from the youngest (my daughter, who is one), to the oldest (Grandpa at 91). The youngest generation is made up of eight girls, all under the age of 11! My grandfather is still waiting for a great grandson!!!
I am lucky enough to come from a stable family where couples stay married for the duration. Last week, my parents celebrated 40 years of marriage and next week my husband and I will celebrate 16 years of marriage. My aunts and uncles are all married 35 plus years. Marriage isn't always easy-almost every couple married for many years has been through ups and downs. They only tell their closest family and friends-infertility, financial woes, health problems, loss of a child, strains of working, difficulties raising children, learning to compromise, and still loving each other through the journey.
It seems like the good times, the fun times and the love make all the bad times seem like distant memories. I can still remember our first few years married, some of the great trips we took, some of the silly things we did and the fun we had being young and in love. Although it's easy to take anniversaries for granted, we shouldn't.
We should celebrate each and every one. In this day and age, a lasting marriage is something to be celebrated. So here's to you-my grandparents-for setting such a fine example of what marriage and love are!
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
My big girl's first day of school...
Well my older Daughter boarded the bus today for her first day of kindergarten. She's been waiting for this for years-literally! I know she's fine-my Mom works at the school and called me to say she's doing great! I don't know who is more excited-Jac or my Mom!
We were married over 10 years when by some miracle Jacqueline did come along. There were many many days I cried thinking I would never get the joy of putting my child on the bus on the first day of school. I have looked forward to this day for years. It's great to experience the "firsts" as a parent. I love that I get to do it one more time with Jenna and experience all the "firsts" one last time.
Being a parent-no matter how you become a parent-is soooo wonderful!
Here are a few pictures of my daughter waiting for and boarding the bus! Thanks for looking!
We were married over 10 years when by some miracle Jacqueline did come along. There were many many days I cried thinking I would never get the joy of putting my child on the bus on the first day of school. I have looked forward to this day for years. It's great to experience the "firsts" as a parent. I love that I get to do it one more time with Jenna and experience all the "firsts" one last time.
Being a parent-no matter how you become a parent-is soooo wonderful!
Here are a few pictures of my daughter waiting for and boarding the bus! Thanks for looking!
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