On Wednesday January 24th, my daughter got her first real haircut. We had been trimming her hair here and there. I really butchered her bangs in November, just before school pictures too!! She was born with little to no hair and lost what little she had. By the time she was one we could gather just enough hair to put a bow in it and it was straight. Around 18 months it started to get longer-and curly overnight. Her hair is so thin and fine. It grew in so slowly. It's longer than it really looks, but curls up a lot!
We went to a kids salon called Snip it which just opened in our town. She was very excited about the haircut. We had to wait, since they don't take appointments, but she was good. They were really nice there and even gave me a discount for waiting (that was nice). She got the works-cut, blow, and wash! It was so cute and kid friendly there!!!
My little girl is growing up!! 
January 22nd is Ironic in so many ways. It's my grandmother's birthday. She turned 80 yesterday! (Happy Birthday Grandma! :) ). It was my due date for my daughter. She wound up being born by C section January 7th, 2003. It's the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade.
When I was pregnant and my due date had finally been pinpointed to January 22nd, I was excited. We thought for sure she was a boy but wanted to be surprised. I really wanted to name the baby Jenna if it was a girl, after my grandmother Jennie. My husband would not agree to it, saying the girl would be made fun of for having the same name as adult start Jenna Jamieson. He still feels this way. We settled on Jacqueline for a girl, but were pretty convinced the baby was a he.
As things turned out, I decided on a C section the week after Christmas and I had her on January 7th, about two weeks earlier than she was due. How cool would it have been for my grandma to have a namesake born on her birthday? Didn't work out that way.
Yesterday marked 34 years since Roe vs. Wade. Still surrounded in contraversy, some oppose it and some defend it. As a hopeful adoptive parent, I would hope more women would keep their babies and place them with families, but the flip side of me understands how for some women the best option given the situation, is abortion and I respect that. Coincidentally, when I was just about 20 weeks pregnant with my baby due January 22nd, they discovered a startling heart problem. The babies heart was on the other side of her chest. My fears of low amniotic fluid and bedrest were out the door-we had bigger problems now. Lots of the symptoms I was having were caused by her heart problem-low amnoitic fluid, baby small in size, gestational diabetes, my cord to the baby only had one vessel. The doctors first told us they thought the baby had heterotaxy syndrome. A very rare disease where all the organs in a babies body are reversed. The prognosis
is not good at all. The doctor said to my face, we should consider termination.
TERMINATION-at 20 weeks? The miracle baby that took years to conceive. I was
so startled and hurt. We immediately said this is not an option. As long as this baby's heart is beating, the pregnancy will go on. God should decide if she lives.
God won't give me more than I can handle. I was so scared. They let me out of
the hospital crying, so I can see a few specialist in New York City and find out
more of what's going on. After a long week of crying and worrying and daily trips to New York City, it was determined that the baby's heart was on the opposite side of her chest, but all organs were in the correct place. We started going to a ediatric cardiologist who then confirmed we were very lucky and all the bloodflow was correct. We were cautiously optimistic with the diagnosis of Dextrocardia (heart on the reverse side of her chest). We still had many weeks to go. I just prayed he was right and my baby would not have to have any major operations, I don't know if I could have taken it.
The week after Christmas, I decided I should have a C-section, after my OBGYN
suggested it. It would be less risky for the baby. A special team would be there
for the baby when it was born, prepared to handle a possible serious heart problem. I could never have forgiven myself if the baby stopped breathing or had complications from a natural delivery. She was born at 9:41AM fiesty and crying. I prayed just before the C section that the baby would be born pink and crying, so I would know everything is OK-no more scares. She was pink, crying, and in excellent health when she was born. The nurses were yelling out to me as they were cleaning her up "She's fine, she's perfect". Our pediatric cardiologist came to the hospital to check her out that day and said it was just as he thought and she was fine.
I thank God every day for my miracle baby and how I did not listen to a doctor.
She is unique and special. Even on the worst days, she is the light of my life.
From the minute I knew I was pregnant, she was a life to me.
The other day, I found the most wonderful adoption support board ever! Everyone was quick to offer and advice and greet me! I didn't even feel like a newbie. It's great for women in all phases of adoption-even post adoption. Terrific advice, information and adoption stories (both domestic and international) .I love going to this board....I hope adoptive parents find it helpful as well! No trolls or scammers here, just a group or lovely ladies offering each other support!!!http://www.rubber-ducky.org/carolynsboards/
Well just to keep everyone up to date-here's the latest...The baby boy in Oklahoma is still available. I know he was 7 pounds 6 oz at birth and his birthmom named him Jerimiah (ironically, we were going to name him Jerry). He was born around the first of the year. She was thrown in jail right after his birth, I am assuming to endangering the welfare of a minor (she came in high to deliver the baby). She will be in jail until at least April and hopefully will be getting her act together. Her sister emails me and says that she (the birthmom) doesn't want to the tribe to get the baby, but probably will never be capable of raising the baby, so he will be up for adoption eventually. She still has not relinquished rights. I am assuming he is in foster care right now, which just kills me. Things could have worked out so much better for this poor little baby. I guess we still have a remote shot for this baby, as the birthmom likes us, but there is a lot of information we would need to know before going forward.I will just stay in touch with her sister who is really nice and helpful and we have quite a bit in common. Our kids even have the same birthdate.*********************We also started newspaper advertising. I thought that was pretty much a thing of the past, but heard a few encouraging adoption stories where connections were made via newspaper ads. I thought the internet was the way to go, but I could be wrong. We'll give it a shot. I am also advertising in NY and PA, so things would be easier if the birthmom were a few hundred miles away and not a few thousand miles away.
This January has been tough. My daughter had a bout with some terrible viral thing that caused high fever and a trip to the ER for dehydration. My husband has also been sick and I have had bronchitis for over a week.I think the reason it's so tough is the reminders. Last year on my daughters' third birthday (January 7th), we announced to our families, I was pregnant. A month later I had a miscarriage. I got pregnant again later in 2006 only to have another miscarriage. That baby was due Jan 30, 2007 and I was eyeing 1/16 as the c section date. A co worker of mine is due January 30th and less than happy about her little surprise. She has two older children and did not want another. She said when she found out she was pregnant, she took a week off from work and just cried for a week straight. Well. She's having a C section this week. I guess you could call it a reversal of fortune for both of us. I cried for a week when I had miscarriage number one and cried for three days straight for miscarriage number two. I can't even listen to certain songs as they remind me of what I have lost. One that brings tears to my eyes in Lee Ann Rimes "Probably wouldn't be this way".Every day I have hope that the phone could ring and one phonecall could change our lives. I have to believe that. Our adoption could be one phone call away. Every day I pray that our little miracle will find us through adoption and our family will be complete. I guess I will have to patient and pray that another little one is meant to join our family!
I am so excited. I helped a family adopt a baby!Project cuddle is a wonderful organization where adoptive families can sign up and be a rescue family at no charge. You may get matched with a birthmom or be matched with a baby recently born. I posted project cuddle info on one of my adoption boards and it sparked an adoptive mom to resubmit her application. Their profile was shown to a potential birthmom due in three months, but that situation did not work out. Then on 12/31 , they were informed of a baby born that morning that needed a home. This baby girl is now theirs! AND Poeple magazine is doing a story about project cuddle and will be featuring them. Let me pat myself on the back a bit.Here's project cuddles website:www.projectcuddle.orgCongrats Jess and family!
