This gets me ticked off! Adoption rant!

Ok so I am surfing the net and look at adoption related information (yet again!)
I visit this facilitators site where she posts all the available situations. She posts the a brief info on the birthmother, the baby's due date, gender (if known) and baby's race.n Couples that use her can let her know if they are interested in a certain birthmother's situtation.

There is this one situtaion for a caucasian baby (gender unknown) and three couples are interested. Let me rephrase that, two couples are interested and a third is only intersted if it' s a girl! Sorry that ticks me off. I don't care if you had 10 boys at home, when you sign on to adopt you should accept a boy or girl. Either sex!

I look at it this way-if a woman is pregnant, she should love and accept the baby regardless of it's a boy or a girl. Right? There would be no chosing, you accept what God sends you. I get so ticked when I saw that-only interested if it's a girl! Adoption is about giving a baby a loving home and nurturing them for the rest of their lives, it's not about picking and choosing the perfect baby to your specifications.

I am happy to see that an overwhelming number of adoptive parents are not picky about the sex of the baby and many are open to different races, drug and alcohol exposure, mental illness history and special needs. I believe there is a family for every baby out there. No child should not have a family to shower him or her with love.

We live in NY and it seems we have cooties here. Nobody wants to work with us. I can't tell you how many situations I see on the internet that do not allow families from NY to apply. Why isn't there universal adoption law in the US? We can't use referrals, lawyer or facilitators to help us make the match. Our only options are networking, newspaper ads and internet advertising. So far all my hard work had gotten us nowhere.

I get an email of a baby boy born two months ago with serious heart problems and he is in need of an open heart surgery to repair the two holes in his heart. Of course it said "No NY families". I emailed the coordintor back and advised if nobody indicates that would like to adopt the child with medical needs, we would be interested if they can find a way to work with NY state law. We live one hour North of NYC, where there is the best caridac care. My Daughter was born with a congenital heart defect and we have been seeing a pediatric cardiologist since I was 20 weeks pregnant. We feel confident we could help this baby.

We are so eager to adopt that we would take a boy or girl and will consider all situations. We are not closed minded and picky. If I had to present my self as a birthmom when I was pregnant, the write up would not have resulted in many interested adoptive parents.

I have decided that I am helping all my online adoption buddies and am forwarding them situations that I see that would be good for them, most of which we are ineligible for. I know it will come back to me 10 fold.